Superlatives
Superlatives are the most
amazing words since the beginning of time. They're always 100% funny, 100% all
of the time. The other day, I went to the end of the galaxy to fuck the hottest
girl in the world with my #1 biggest penis and she screamed louder than any girl
ever before, or than any ever will forever. It was the single most amazing thing
that has ever happened or will ever happen to anyone.
Anything anywhere that might have happened prior that you think was more
amazing...is something you're completely wrong about. It was nothing compared to
this. You could never even believe it, not if you lived forever, because it
happened for me and only me (and her). And no other experience anyone else has
will be remotely comparable. It rocked the entire realm of everything everywhere
throughout all of the infinite endless expanse that is and was and will be. It
ruled. It was the one thing by which everything else everywhere will be defined,
always.
And if you disagree, guess what? Who cares? I'm right. One time, I was doing
math, and I got a wrong answer. WRONG! I never got a wrong answer, because I'm
always right about all matters that concern anyone and anything in any place,
anywhere and everywhere.
See what I'm saying here about superlatives and absolutisms dominating all the other puny little
words?
Then you never will.
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© 2006 FussyPucker.